


terrible things

by sunsetveins



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Character Death, F/M, Female Harry, Genderswap, Sad, Songfic, Terrible Things - Mayday Parade, basically but i removed the lyrics from this version, but there is a boy harry, harry is harry but there is another harry???, it is what i have been told by the fam, it makes sense when you read it i promise, like harry is female, not really sad but more like life destroying i suppose, you'll see - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-11
Updated: 2016-06-11
Packaged: 2018-07-14 09:47:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7166252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunsetveins/pseuds/sunsetveins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Now, son, I'm only telling you this<br/>Because life can do terrible things.</p>
            </blockquote>





	terrible things

**Author's Note:**

> this was a songfic for the song terrible things by mayday parade. i removed the lyrics from this version, but you should listen to the song before or while reading this. it adds to the overall effect.

"You're only 16, Louis, you don't have to worry about that kind of thing right now." His mother was scolding him for maybe the fifteenth time that week for whining about wanting to meet someone. It was only Tuesday.

But to be honest, Louis didn't see how this was something he didn't have to worry about. It's important. He worried about it because it was important. 

His friends had all found someone to love. They were so involved with them and it made Louis a little upset. He wanted someone to fawn over. He wanted someone to be in love with.

Why couldn't his mother understand this? It didn't matter that he was only 16, this was something he absolutely needed to worry about. Really, he should've been worrying 2 years ago. Michael and Katie had started dating when they were both 14 and they were still together today. That could've been Louis, had he been worrying about it back then.

"But mum! You don't understand. I'm the only one without someone and I like, I need to worry about it. It's important." Louis knew she would just sigh and tell him to be careful, so listening to her next words didn't seem all that important. He glanced down at his phone, reading a group chat message about some couples meetup that he obviously wasn't going to be a part of. Why was he still in that chat?

"-ease be careful, alright?" 

"I will, mum."

-

"Who is that?" 

Niall was pointing to a girl sitting in the windowsill of the cafeteria. Luke looked up from where he and Ashton had their heads bent together and squinted in that direction. 

"The girl in the window?" Ashton asked. 

"Yeah," Niall nodded, "I don't think I've ever seen her around before." 

Michael glanced over that way and shrugged his shoulders, "Maybe she's that new kid everyone has been ranting on about. You know, the one with the flower crowns that works over at that dollar store that sells all kinds of obscure shit? I think she got here last week."

Liam nudged at Louis' shoulder, causing the older to glance up. Liam pointed over to the window and tilted his head at Louis. "Have you met the new girl, Lou?"

Louis peered over and he swears his heart might've stopped beating. Probably did, to be honest. She was beautiful. Long, curly brown hair and a creamy white complexion. Purple flowers placed so delicately in her curls, sitting like it was meant to float along the chocolate waves. Her dress, printed in black and white x's with a pale purple lining, flowed to her knee with a lace trim around the bottom. It went well with her pastel purple converse. 

From where he was, her face was mostly hidden by a curtain of thick hair, but he didn't really need to see her face to know she was the most beautiful person he'd ever know. He had to talk to her.

"No, but I think I want to."

He didn't really notice, far too busy staring and drifting into a "pretty person love me" daydream, but she had caught him. Multiple times in fact. Actually, she was moving towards his lunch table now.

Niall elbowed him, "Looks like you'll get your wish, mate." He was grinning.

"What?"

-

"Um," the goddess started, "Hi?" 

She was right in front of Louis. Holy fuck, she was right there and he was right, she is so fucking beautiful jesus fuck. He didn't know humans came this pretty. There's no way. She has to be an angel.

The goddess/angel/otherworldly being blushed, looking down at her feet and nervously fiddling with her flower crown. 

Oh shit. Did he say that out loud?

"I- I uh, I noticed something. You were uh- uh, staring? At me? And I was um, just like, I was wondering if maybe I was right and you do like me?" She talked really slowly, kind of at the same pace as chocolate melting, and Louis doesn't know if it's possible to love a person you've only just met as much as he loves this angel.

"Oh gosh," she covers her mouth and her face seems to twist up in worry, "I'm sorry. That was forward and rude and I shouldn't have even said anything. Maybe I had something on my back or you weren't even looking at me or just, yeah- like. I'm sorry. I'm just going to go now. I'm sorry, really sorry."

She went to leave, face a brilliant red and hands twitching nervously. Louis called out at just the right time though, seconds before she might've been too far away to hear him.

"Wait!" he called. "You never told me your name."

She blushed even deeper, if it were possible, and replied while occasionally glancing down to the floor. "M'names Harry. No, it's not short for Harriet. It's just Harry. With a y." 

Louis smiled softly, and he was so fucking sure of his next statement, "Hi, Harry. I'm Louis. I'm Louis, L-O-U-I-S, and I am very enamored with you."

"Hi, Louis," Harry smiled, big and cheesy with sparkling green eyes and dimpled cheeks, "I believe I'm enamored with you, too."

-

"Why are you telling me this story, dad? You never wanted to tell me anything before." His son, Harold - who actually went by Harry himself - asked. His eyes, shiny and greener than his mother's could've ever had hoped to be, shot beams straight through Louis' chest. He never could breathe right when Harry looked at him like his mother once had, so trusting and loving and questioning. They were both so curious that it hurt.

"Because life, Harry, can do terrible things."

-

No one had ever cared to enter the park late at night on the weekends. That's how they created the tradition of getting drunk under the watchful eyes of the stars above. 

They'd started it when they were seventeen and it carried until they were nineteen. The park remained empty and so they'd drink their weight in wine and lay underneath the twinkling night sky. Nothing was ever really funny, but they'd find themselves laughing until their stomachs ached and their eyes began to burn with unshed tears. It would lead to conversations about anything and everything under the moon they could think to talk about.

They were young and stupid. Worry didn't seem to exist and they knew, told themselves so many times, that they would always be together. Forever until the sun stopped shining and all of the stars burnt out along with it. 

They were in love. Nothing could hurt them.

-

"Harry," Louis began, "I know we're short on money and nothing seems to make sense right now. But, but I love you. I know that I love you. I know that waiting any longer seems like a crime. So, so uh - I made you something and it's pretty pathetic but, but I hope you can accept it."

Louis reached in his pocket, pulling what looked like a strip of paper and string out of it. He held it in his palm and showed it to Harry, who was near tears and shaking her head.

"I know it's not a proper piece and you probably won't do anything with it, but I promise if you say yes I will get you a proper ring. I'll make you a queen, queen of everything you see. I swear I will. I - I just, I just need you to answer me when I ask you to, I. I - uh. Will you - will you, um, marry me?" His knee was aching from the hardwood of the floor and the paper ring sat weirdly in his hand, scratching every time he shook, but he swears it all washed out into white noise when Harry nodded her head, whispering the word "yes" over and over again.

-

"It hurts," Louis whimpered, hand shaking as he gripped the phone. 

"I know," Liam soothed, "I'm so sorry, mate. I wish you wouldn't put so much stress on yourself about telling him. He's just 16 an-"

"And so was I when I met her. He needs to know. I - fuck. Life is shit, Li, and he needs to know that. He deserves to know he has a choice."

"A choice of what? To be alone forever or maybe end up hurt after years of happiness?" Louis knows Liam regrets his words seconds after he says it.

"I hope he never has to be me, Liam. But life does terrible things and I just think it's his right to know that. That's all."

-

"Louis?" Harry asked, slow voice suddenly shaky and unnerved, "I have something that I need to talk to you about."

She had become as thin as a twig and paler than any ghost in any movie. Louis didn't want to think anything of it. He wanted to be nineteen and chilling in the park, drunk and laughing at the stars. He wanted to be stupid.

She couldn't be stupid anymore.

"Louis, baby. I - I'm sick, Lou. I know you know. You have to know. I know you don't want to know, just like I haven't wanted to know, but. Babe. Babe, I don't have much longer," Her voice shook horribly and her green eyes were teary and red. Louis shook his head in denial.

"No, no, no." 

Harry smiled, and it was so fucking fake and full of pity. Louis wanted to vomit.

She walked closer to him, sitting in his lap and stroking a thumb over his wet cheek.

"Don't be sad, baby. Please," She pleaded with him in the softest voice Louis has ever heard come out of her mouth. It made his shoulders begin to shake. He buried his head in her neck.

"Please, no. Don't leave me. I can't, I can't please don't go." 

Harry's hand was in his hair. She was trying so hard to soothe him. He felt like shit. She shouldn't be soothing him. He wasn't fucking dying, now was he?

Still, he sobbed for hours. He cried until he was on the verge of falling asleep.

Right before he drifted off, he felt her lips against his ear as she whispered to him.

"You were the greatest thing that ever happened to me."

-

Their son was only 2. He was with his grandparents. Louis was grateful.

He never ever wanted his son to have to watch his father bawl his eyes out, on his knees, feeling like the entire world was trying to suffocate him.

-

Harry, his Harry, was everything that Louis had. His son was a part of her - a part that he got to keep. He never wants to see Harry go through something like this, never wants him to lose everything he has and only be left with memories and a headache in the morning.

Louis was lucky to have his son. His son might not be that lucky.

He begs him, begs and pleads that he thinks and chooses as wisely as he can.

He knows, knows deep inside that he's a hypocrite. He wouldn't go back and change his mind for the world. But he can't bear the thought of his son being like him. Can't breathe when he wakes from a nightmare about it.

He needed to give him some kind of choice.

-

"But she was the best thing that ever happened to me."

**Author's Note:**

> kill you or nah?


End file.
